#Defund Domestic Violence Enablers
Here’s another story for you....When I was 19 years old I lived in Jacksonville, FL. Originally in Jacksonville to attend Jacksonville University, but shortly after meeting my boyfriend at the time, Billy, school was no longer a priority for me. Billy was charming, but he was an addict and a drug dealer. I became wrapped up in his way of life. He made me feel like he was the only one that loved me, in a sense I was brainwashed. I wanted nothing to do with my family because billy had convinced me, they would never be there for me like he was. I was 19, he was 26 and had been living on his own since 16. I thought I was safer with him than with anyone else in the world. Eventually, Billy became overbearing and controlling. Which ultimately led to violent outbursts. I was punched, kicked, choked, had my foot slammed in a car door, I was stabbed, essentially abused daily. I was afraid to leave him. I felt like I had nothing without him. Even as I sat in the hospital getting stitched from being punched in the face yet again, I was praying he wouldn’t be angry that I got blood all over his car.
One day things escalated to the point where I actually called the cops. I had a job interview that day and as I was leaving, Billy started on with, “ O you think you’re better than me now because your all dressed up?” I ignored him. That didn’t work for him so he threw me down and began choking me. I remember thinking “this is it, I’m dead.” I lost consciousness, when I came to Billy was standing over me yelling at me about how all this was my fault. I had never seen him look crazier. I told him that I’d call the cops. He grabbed a floor lamp and hit himself in the middle of the forehead over and over. Yelling “Who do you think the cops will believe?!” I ran upstairs grabbing a knife from the kitchen on my way. I locked the door and called the cops. As I looked outside the window on the phone with the dispatcher,
I saw billy run to a neighbors and they let him in. The cops finally arrived and I came out if the house, crying and shaking. Billy came out from the neighbors home along with the neighbor, a white male. As I approached the cops, Billy yelled “She’s crazy!! Get her!” Without hesitation the cops cuffed me and put me in the backseat of the car, even though I was the one that called for help. The two white male officers talked with Billy and the neighbor and at this point I began to cry hysterically. I knew once again he would use his charm to turn the whole thing around on me. After he said his piece, one of the officers came to the car and asked me about the gash on Billy’s forehead. Through my tears I tried to explain to them that the wound was self inflicted, that he had been beating and choking me. The officer said, “come on now, he didn’t do that to himself...where you two fighting?” I stopped talking. I knew my words meant nothing and knew I’d be going to jail that day. It wasn’t until another neighbor, a white female came over to see what was going on and noticed my bruises and strangulation marks around my neck that the cops wanted to listen to me. The lady said, “ OMG!! Look! He’s been hurting her! Look at her neck, look at her!” Finally they were paying attention. Billy was eventually arrested and charged with assault and battery. I say all this to say, #defundthepolice is an effort to prevent situations like mine and the countless instances where police brutality supersedes the ability to serve and protect. Billy was white, all 6’3 ft of him. Because of the color of my skin, my pain, my voice, meant nothing to those officers until a white woman spoke up on my behalf. The police aren’t listening to us, they aren’t out to help us. Just because you haven’t personally experienced systemic racism with regards to the police, that doesn’t mean it isn’t happening. #blm #blacklivesmatter